29 April, 2011

Confessions of a Job-a-holic

A while back, prior to now, jumping around was not a difficult thing. Jumping in and out of jobs, relationships, home(s) etc. I am a Pisces and rumor has it that once our habitat in the ocean begins to get heated up, we swim to cooler parts of the ocean. That, my dears, is the summary of my work-life. Make that entire life! *sadly so too*
But I am glad we learn every day ~ for those of us who are open-minded enough to learn.
I was brought up in several homes as a kid. No thanks to my Younique background of Six Parents ~ Three Dads and Three Moms. For de-tales see previous post here. Anyways, back to the present, I have learned a lot about life since I left my nest, scratch that – since I left my parents nest. #Thankfully!!!
As I watched Will and Kate, I could not but imagine what the ceremony would have been like if Diana was alive, not only alive, but …
Back to Mee, while I was growing up for instance, all I needed to do to change my environment was holla at any of my Six parents and complain about trivia (trivia here ranges from petty stuff like “she gave me a bad look” to “I was served cold dinner today”). And almost immediately, the summoned party/parties made arrangements to relocate me. I mean, it was that easy!
Little wonder, I got a totally wrong impression about how the real-world was run.
Sadly, no one ever encouraged me to stay put or endure or forbear. The circumstances were daunting actually, so it would have been mean if they had asked me to forbear. A particular guardian actually used to drum these words into my ears though, “forbear your rights to maintain peace” and in my honest opinion, that’s hogwash!
-รจ Ok, let me fess up here, ~ “my honest opinion” here actually happens to be the opinion of another guardian who was at loggerheads with Mrs. Forbearance of Rights! Their constant bickering didn’t help me adjust properly because at that time, I didn’t dare take sides with anyone.
I subsequently became an extremist. Forbearing where I should have spoken up and speaking out where I should have been silent. Striking a balance was a bit of a challenge because my teenage soul had no idea what “balance” was anymore. To say I was tossed to and fro would be putting it mildly, LOL. Thank God these things are now a thing-of-the-past though.
Err did I actually just refer to these things as a “Thing of the past?” His-story? Who am I kidding? As if I am not now suffering the effects of constantly being made to move around…  In six years, I have worked in six different companies and four industries SMH. Job-hopper of the highest order; who says our experiences don’t shape our future? RME!
It beats my imagination when I see people jump in and out of marriage. Divorce affects the kids more than it does the adults. (At least the adults are expected to be older and thus assumed to be wiser and more stable). Sadly, many homes are broken, although not at the centre, and the effect of this ‘brokenness’ is often worse than the challenges of divorce.
Royal or Not; May our Homes be Happy and our Marriages Blessed, and so be it!

26 April, 2011

Cost Benefit Analyses

I first came across the word in the early ‘90’s, whilst reading a copy of Readers Digest; and ever since that time, I wanted to work as a “freelance”.  ~ The thought of operating without long-term contractual commitments to any one employer appealed to my teenage soul and I daresay it lodged itself in my subconscious, manifesting later on-the-job in my 20’s.
Sadly, this commitment shyness is evident in other aspects of my life. Dangerously approaching middle age, I am yet to call any one man my own. It’s just too much work, plenty of heart-work I must confess! Why should I limit myself to just one man of all the very many fine gentlemen in this world …for ever?!? I mean, till death doth us part?!? *sigh* why do these things have to be so hard?
Whilst I sometimes admire those who are bold enough to commit, for the most part, I hardly, if ever, envy them. I totally agree that it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, but I cannot imagine having to love just one person legally for ever. It takes a lot of nerve to choose to pour all your love on one person in my opinion. A great deal of nerve, whaaattt!!!
The one who I choose must be worth every ounce of my love. He must be really worth all that drama and love. Yes, drama. I am a drama queen, and having invested so much in myself, I’d hate to share my life and person with someone who deserves less than I am. It can be very frustrating to realize that all the work and effort I put into making me Mee will go wasted on an undeserving bloke for love’s sake!
On the flip side, the rewards of commitment far outweigh the costs; hard-work or heart-work, as the case may be. As I have come to realize, those who make the sacrifice often reap the benefits. As you well know, there are always exceptions to the rule. But largely, hard work pays, especially when it is strategic thus culminating in smart-work.
It takes great strength and character to love and commit. And no matter how difficult the climb is, it always pays to remember the top is usually cooler than the bottom, thus compensating for all the hard work. Endure the climb be it on-the-job or in a relationship aka love-walk; the rewards and benefits far outweigh the costs. Oh, of course, there are costs. There is always a cost. Life is a series of trade-offs! Nothing comes from nothing.
As usual, this is my current opinion it is subject to change over time!